Lately Billy and I have been trying to cut back on our expenses as much as we can. Yes, our primary goal is to save money...but it's interesting to me that the less we spend, the more satisfied I begin to feel. Sure...it's super annoying not going to Chick-fil-A for my very regular (think multiple times a week!) unsweet tea or Diet Dr. Pepper. And I definitely miss eating out...that's just one of those things that I like doing. BUT we want to save more money, and right now that's more important than the instant gratification of buying what I want when I want it.
I've been thinking about frugality today and how that looks different for everyone. Ever since Billy got laid off in 2010 we've tried to really cut back. I guess that was the motivation we needed to start our "frugal journey." Before that, we definitely didn't have a lot of money, but we also didn't have any children, and we just spent our money however we wanted (for the most part). Obviously, we paid all of our bills and took care of the necessities...but whatever was left we just used when we wanted something. Once Billy lost his job (Ellie was just a month old at the time) I started looking into couponing and how to save more money, which is how I discovered Money Saving Mom (what would I do without her blog?!?), as well as the whole do-it-yourself-make-it-from-scratch phenomenon. It really amazes me to look back at how we handled our money then as opposed to now!
Prior to our frugal-living efforts, we spent $100 per week on groceries...for two people. With the amount of money Billy was making at the time, that was really a stupid decision on our part. Not sure what we were thinking spending $400 a month on groceries, but I think it can be attributed to not making a list, and just buying whatever struck my fancy at the grocery store. And buying a lot of name brands. And *a lot* of processed, pre-packaged foods. Back then, I would give you the stink eye if you suggested buying store-brand peanut butter. Only Jif for me, thank you. Now, take a look in my pantry....ain't no Jif in there. Just Kroger brand peanut butter. And oh my goodness, if the cheese wasn't Kraft then it was contaminated. Again...Kroger brand in my refrigerator right now. Needless to say, I was a little ridiculous over my brand preferences. Now I'm not completely brand-free...I still buy Heinz ketchup and Lipton tea bags (never even tried the store brand...old habits die hard). But honestly, I think that's pretty much it. I certainly have brand preferences...but that's another story.
Now, we spend $50 for a family of three (Piper doesn't count yet since she doesn't eat real food). And that $50 includes food, hygiene, cleaning, baby, and dog products. Honestly, there are some weeks that I wonder, "How in the world am I going to make this work?" By the way, read this lady's post if you're interested in hard-core frugality...it will blow your mind! But really it's just a learning process...and the grace of God. Can't forget that... =)
I am by no means perfect at the saving-money thing (nor do I think everyone should spend $50 on groceries...this is what works for us). I know *so* many people who do this better than we do. But that's my whole point...frugality looks different for everyone.
Two years ago, we were spending $100 a week on groceries for two people, as well as buying stupid things from Sam's Club for the fun of it haha. We had cable TV (granted, it was the "ghetto basic" cable...just local channels for like $10 a month), plus Netflix, ate out multiple times per week, and bought basically whatever we wanted when we wanted it. We were also very unhealthy haha.
A year ago, we were spending $50 on two people (Ellie didn't count since she was just doing baby food, courtesy of WIC) and dabbling in making food from scratch, as well as other money-saving activities, like homemade laundry detergent. We still ate out fairly frequently, had cable TV, and Netflix. Started eating better, though!
This year, we're spending $50 a week for three people (no WIC now) and making 90% of our meals from scratch. We don't subscribe to any TV stuff (no cable, Netflix, or Hulu). We watch movies that we already own, watch shows online for free, and rent movies from Redbox when there are free codes available. We also rent from the library on occasion. I haven't bought laundry detergent since last year (I stocked up when I had some really high value coupons and it was on sale, plus make my own liquid detergent). We don't eat a zillion sides with our meals anymore...usually just the main course and either bread or a vegetable. I also make meatless meals a couple times a week. If there's something extra that we need/want (dishwasher packets and baby wipes, for example) I buy them on Amazon when I have a gift card, which I earn for free through Swagbucks. Date nights and any eating out are now paid by our "fun money jar," which consists of all of our loose change, as well as any gift money we receive from family (unless we really need something, then that money goes to basic necessities!). Clothes are bought with gift cards that I get for my birthday or Christmas.
Can we scale back any more? Oh my, yes. We go over budget occasionally, and until recently we were still eating out at least once a week. I keep our house very cool, so I could definitely save money on the electric bill by pushing the thermostat up. I could hang dry our clothes instead of drying them. I could buy cloth diapers instead of disposable. I could stop buying splurge items at the grocery store, like chocolate or tea bags. I could plant a container garden instead of buying fruits and vegetables. We could downsize to one vehicle instead of two and a half (I say the motorcycle counts as half because it can't transport our whole family haha). The list is endless. The point is that it's a process. Our lifestyle is quite different compared to two years ago. And in my book, that's success. Not that we're the most frugal people, or that we have the this whole living-beneath-our-means thing down-pat. But we are trying.
Through this process, we're learning to become better stewards of what we've been given. I think that's where the satisfaction comes in. I get pretty excited when we pay for a date night with cash that we saved in our jar. And $1 for a pack of Pampers diapers? I basically acted like a two year old when I told Billy. "Guess what?!? Guess how much I spent on diapers?? Guess!!!" It's not a race or a contest...it's just a process of slowly tweaking our lifestyle so that we can live comfortably in the good times and the bad. Frugal living looks different for everyone, and seeing the progress we've made in the last two years is such an encouragement to me. Our frugal journey isn't over...I don't think it will ever be over. I'd like to think that someday we might have more money, but we're definitely not guaranteed that. So we might as well learn to make do with what we have and learn to have contentment in that.
Friday, July 20, 2012
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
Piper and Acid Reflux
Since Piper's birth, she has been a different baby compared to Ellie. Not a whole lot of surprise there...every baby is different, and I certainly didn't expect Piper to be exactly like Ellie. She had a little bit of chronic spit up after feedings, but nothing as awful as what Ellie had. I mentioned it to the doctor, but he said as long as she's happy it's nothing to worry about. He did say that it means she has some reflux, but it doesn't bother some babies. He said not to worry about it unless she were crying a lot or having trouble feeding. So I didn't think too much about it at the time.
A little backstory here...Ellie also had acid reflux as an infant. REALLY bad reflux. Even in the NICU she was known as a "spitter." And not just a little bit of spit up...like her entire bottle would come back up and end up all over you or the floor. Sometimes it was projectile spit up...blech. It was pretty miserable for all of us. Not long after she came home from the hospital, Billy and I were trying to feed Ellie her bottle and both of us were just about to rip our hair out. It was the middle of the night, and Ellie was just screaming and crying and thrashing every time we put the bottle in her mouth. I tried everything I could think of and just couldn't get her to eat. It would take 45 minutes to an hour for her to drink 2 or 3 ounces of formula. I knew something was wrong. No baby should take that long to eat or cry that much. So we saw our pediatrician and it was pretty obvious that she had painful acid reflux. She went on Ranitidine (which is like Zantac, so it helps with the reflux pain) and Reglan (which was for the spit up, since hers was so high in volume and sometimes forceful). After a week or two, we really started to see an improvement. She was still a major spitter, but she was finally a happy spitter. We just accommodated for the spit up problem. I always packed multiple outfits if we were going to be out of the house for more than half an hour, and always had multiple burp cloths and receiving blankets to use for clean up. I stopped giving her the medications somewhere around 6 months (since she didn't seem to really need it anymore) and the spit up ended around 9 months.
Once we came home from the hospital, I quickly realized that Piper was a fussy baby. She had a lot of issues with sleeping, even early on when most babies pretty much sleep all of the time. It took us a good month to really get her in a sleeping routine, and even then she still cried quite a bit. It got so tiring for me to listen to her cry what seemed like all the time, and eventually we just got used to it. I never could figure out why she cried so much, because she was a great eater and never seemed to have any issues with that. She started sleeping through the night, and I thought we had finally gotten in our stride and that things would get better.
About a week and a half ago, she stopped sleeping through the night. At the most, she would sleep 6 hours, but some nights it was 4-5. I thought maybe she was going through a growth spurt and that things would level out after a few days, but it never did. Then she started having feeding issues...arching her back while nursing, crying during and after her feedings. I started to suspect reflux, since those symptoms were very similar to what Ellie had. But I kept thinking, "She's 3 months old, this shouldn't be showing up now all of a sudden." But after a week, I decided to call the doctor and get the nurse's opinion because things weren't getting better.
So I called the nurse and she said it definitely sounded like reflux. We saw the doctor and he concluded the same thing. Apparently, some babies don't show major symptoms until they're several months old. Thankfully, it hasn't influenced her growth...she's gained a pound and a half in the past month (so now she's 13 lbs. 11 oz....our little chunk!). So now Piper is on Ranitidine. I really didn't want her to have to be on medication, but we're already starting to see an improvement so I know it's working.
In one way, it's frustrating because the doctor said that if both of our girls have had painful reflux, it's most likely that any other children we have will also have this problem. Apparently it runs in families. However, at least we know what to look for in the future! =)
The other good thing that has come out of this is that I used to beat myself up over not breastfeeding Ellie, and I used to wonder if she wouldn't have had reflux issues had she been on breast milk instead of formula. Now we know that it wouldn't have mattered, since Piper has it, too. I wish I had bothered to ask the doctor back then when we were going through it with Ellie, because it would have saved me a lot of guilt and frustration.
So anyway, that's where we are right now. It's been a bit challenging, but I'm thankful that she's improving and sleeping better. The past two nights she has slept 8 hours straight, which hasn't happened in quite a while, so you can bet I've been a happy mommy the past two days =). Her demeanor is improving, too. She's smiling and "playing" more than she has in the past couple of weeks, and her naps are much more regular than they were. I feel like we're *finally* starting to move toward a normal routine, which had been a source of frustration for me before I knew what was going on with her. Piper is still a bit more high-maintenance than Ellie was, but I'm just grateful to see my little one acting more comfortable and happy.
And as a random side note....Ellie peed in her potty for the first time today! I was kinda trying to hold her off on that, since I can't really commit to hard core potty training right now (with having another baby, nursing 6 or 7 times a day, etc.) but Ellie was demanding to have her pants taken off so she could sit on the potty, so I gave in haha. Now I can't get her to leave the potty alone. At least she's enthusiastic! =) Ideally, I would love for her to be potty trained, but I just don't know that she's really capable of telling me when she needs to pee, or pulling her pants up and down by herself. She still goes in her diaper during naps, and I just don't want to put all this energy and effort into getting her potty trained if she's just not developmentally ready. Oh well...maybe we'll just have to take the "slow and gradual" approach!
A little backstory here...Ellie also had acid reflux as an infant. REALLY bad reflux. Even in the NICU she was known as a "spitter." And not just a little bit of spit up...like her entire bottle would come back up and end up all over you or the floor. Sometimes it was projectile spit up...blech. It was pretty miserable for all of us. Not long after she came home from the hospital, Billy and I were trying to feed Ellie her bottle and both of us were just about to rip our hair out. It was the middle of the night, and Ellie was just screaming and crying and thrashing every time we put the bottle in her mouth. I tried everything I could think of and just couldn't get her to eat. It would take 45 minutes to an hour for her to drink 2 or 3 ounces of formula. I knew something was wrong. No baby should take that long to eat or cry that much. So we saw our pediatrician and it was pretty obvious that she had painful acid reflux. She went on Ranitidine (which is like Zantac, so it helps with the reflux pain) and Reglan (which was for the spit up, since hers was so high in volume and sometimes forceful). After a week or two, we really started to see an improvement. She was still a major spitter, but she was finally a happy spitter. We just accommodated for the spit up problem. I always packed multiple outfits if we were going to be out of the house for more than half an hour, and always had multiple burp cloths and receiving blankets to use for clean up. I stopped giving her the medications somewhere around 6 months (since she didn't seem to really need it anymore) and the spit up ended around 9 months.
Once we came home from the hospital, I quickly realized that Piper was a fussy baby. She had a lot of issues with sleeping, even early on when most babies pretty much sleep all of the time. It took us a good month to really get her in a sleeping routine, and even then she still cried quite a bit. It got so tiring for me to listen to her cry what seemed like all the time, and eventually we just got used to it. I never could figure out why she cried so much, because she was a great eater and never seemed to have any issues with that. She started sleeping through the night, and I thought we had finally gotten in our stride and that things would get better.
About a week and a half ago, she stopped sleeping through the night. At the most, she would sleep 6 hours, but some nights it was 4-5. I thought maybe she was going through a growth spurt and that things would level out after a few days, but it never did. Then she started having feeding issues...arching her back while nursing, crying during and after her feedings. I started to suspect reflux, since those symptoms were very similar to what Ellie had. But I kept thinking, "She's 3 months old, this shouldn't be showing up now all of a sudden." But after a week, I decided to call the doctor and get the nurse's opinion because things weren't getting better.
So I called the nurse and she said it definitely sounded like reflux. We saw the doctor and he concluded the same thing. Apparently, some babies don't show major symptoms until they're several months old. Thankfully, it hasn't influenced her growth...she's gained a pound and a half in the past month (so now she's 13 lbs. 11 oz....our little chunk!). So now Piper is on Ranitidine. I really didn't want her to have to be on medication, but we're already starting to see an improvement so I know it's working.
In one way, it's frustrating because the doctor said that if both of our girls have had painful reflux, it's most likely that any other children we have will also have this problem. Apparently it runs in families. However, at least we know what to look for in the future! =)
The other good thing that has come out of this is that I used to beat myself up over not breastfeeding Ellie, and I used to wonder if she wouldn't have had reflux issues had she been on breast milk instead of formula. Now we know that it wouldn't have mattered, since Piper has it, too. I wish I had bothered to ask the doctor back then when we were going through it with Ellie, because it would have saved me a lot of guilt and frustration.
So anyway, that's where we are right now. It's been a bit challenging, but I'm thankful that she's improving and sleeping better. The past two nights she has slept 8 hours straight, which hasn't happened in quite a while, so you can bet I've been a happy mommy the past two days =). Her demeanor is improving, too. She's smiling and "playing" more than she has in the past couple of weeks, and her naps are much more regular than they were. I feel like we're *finally* starting to move toward a normal routine, which had been a source of frustration for me before I knew what was going on with her. Piper is still a bit more high-maintenance than Ellie was, but I'm just grateful to see my little one acting more comfortable and happy.
And as a random side note....Ellie peed in her potty for the first time today! I was kinda trying to hold her off on that, since I can't really commit to hard core potty training right now (with having another baby, nursing 6 or 7 times a day, etc.) but Ellie was demanding to have her pants taken off so she could sit on the potty, so I gave in haha. Now I can't get her to leave the potty alone. At least she's enthusiastic! =) Ideally, I would love for her to be potty trained, but I just don't know that she's really capable of telling me when she needs to pee, or pulling her pants up and down by herself. She still goes in her diaper during naps, and I just don't want to put all this energy and effort into getting her potty trained if she's just not developmentally ready. Oh well...maybe we'll just have to take the "slow and gradual" approach!
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| Piper "playing" (can't believe she's 3 months old already!) |
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| Ellie running in my heels (23 months old tomorrow!) |
Thursday, July 5, 2012
4th of July
We had a great 4th of July...I really don't think we've had that much fun in a while. Earlier in the day, we went downtown for a little while to see if anything interesting was going on, but most of the fun stuff wasn't scheduled to start until the early evening. So we came back home and the girls took their naps, and Billy and I just sat and talked. Sometimes it's hard for us to just sit and connect like that...I think we get distracted so easily by technology (like our phones and the laptop) when the girls are asleep because we need some quiet time to ourselves...but it was so nice to just talk with no distractions.
We invited some friends to come over for dinner, like a bring-your-own-meat cookout. We bought drinks, chips, and corn on the cob, so the BYOM was just an easy way to save a little money and then people could eat whatever they wanted. And really, everyone just ended up sharing whatever they brought anyway. It actually turned out a little larger than I expected...we ended up having 8 adults (including me and Billy). It was SO fun to hang out with other adults. I really don't think I do that enough these days =). Of course, Ellie was loving all the attention and immediately made some new friends, the Hinkles, and then cried when they left haha.
I really want to do this more often...I think my natural tendency is to remain shut in and not really hang out with people. I definitely don't like that aspect of my personality, but I think it's easily overcome. I really just need to be intentional about making the effort to spend time with friends instead of waiting for someone else to come up with the idea. I'm so glad we had people over yesterday...it really gave my spirit a lift to talk and laugh and just be relaxed.
I'm still plugging away at my weight loss...slowly but surely. Sometimes I get kinda discouraged about it, because it is so SLOW compared to last time I did Weight Watchers. I'm trying to remind myself that I'm nursing, so it's going to be a slower process since Piper relies on me for food. Before, I lost the weight pretty quickly because I didn't need to consume as many calories as I do now. I just keep telling myself that even if I only lose one pound a week, that's still one pound gone. I'm hoping to meet my first weight loss goal this week...8 pounds, which is 5% of my body weight. And then I'll set a new goal!
And as a quick side note...I have been driving myself crazy trying to think of what to do with Ellie's hair. I'm not ready to cut it, because it's so pretty and I'm just afraid that cutting it will ruin the perfect curly-ness of her hair. Plus, I don't think she's emotionally ready for the whole sit-in-a-chair-while-someone-touches-my-head thing. So now we're doing pigtails. I'm not very good at styling hair (I can barely do my own hair to make it look decent) but since she's little, I think we can get away with the messy pigtails. Here's a picture:
What a stinking cute kid. This picture really shows how much she's grown up...definitely not a baby anymore! Which makes me kinda sad =(
Hope everyone had a great Independence Day!
We invited some friends to come over for dinner, like a bring-your-own-meat cookout. We bought drinks, chips, and corn on the cob, so the BYOM was just an easy way to save a little money and then people could eat whatever they wanted. And really, everyone just ended up sharing whatever they brought anyway. It actually turned out a little larger than I expected...we ended up having 8 adults (including me and Billy). It was SO fun to hang out with other adults. I really don't think I do that enough these days =). Of course, Ellie was loving all the attention and immediately made some new friends, the Hinkles, and then cried when they left haha.
I really want to do this more often...I think my natural tendency is to remain shut in and not really hang out with people. I definitely don't like that aspect of my personality, but I think it's easily overcome. I really just need to be intentional about making the effort to spend time with friends instead of waiting for someone else to come up with the idea. I'm so glad we had people over yesterday...it really gave my spirit a lift to talk and laugh and just be relaxed.
I'm still plugging away at my weight loss...slowly but surely. Sometimes I get kinda discouraged about it, because it is so SLOW compared to last time I did Weight Watchers. I'm trying to remind myself that I'm nursing, so it's going to be a slower process since Piper relies on me for food. Before, I lost the weight pretty quickly because I didn't need to consume as many calories as I do now. I just keep telling myself that even if I only lose one pound a week, that's still one pound gone. I'm hoping to meet my first weight loss goal this week...8 pounds, which is 5% of my body weight. And then I'll set a new goal!
And as a quick side note...I have been driving myself crazy trying to think of what to do with Ellie's hair. I'm not ready to cut it, because it's so pretty and I'm just afraid that cutting it will ruin the perfect curly-ness of her hair. Plus, I don't think she's emotionally ready for the whole sit-in-a-chair-while-someone-touches-my-head thing. So now we're doing pigtails. I'm not very good at styling hair (I can barely do my own hair to make it look decent) but since she's little, I think we can get away with the messy pigtails. Here's a picture:
Hope everyone had a great Independence Day!
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Reflections on Motherhood
It's the middle of the night, but I've had all these thoughts going through my mind and needed to put them into words. I just can't sleep until I've processed all of these emotions. I actually wrote all of this on paper tonight in bed because I couldn't sleep, and then decided to go ahead and type it in a post.
I am feeling so sentimental tonight. I have felt on the verge of tears all evening and I'm not really sure why. I've been thinking a lot about my life...my husband, my children, my relationship with God. Just trying to process where I am right now and how I'm living my life, if I'm really allowing myself to live freely, love deeply, and let myself truly feel everything.
I've been reflecting a lot on these small moments of my day...holding Ellie, reading stories, nursing Piper, watching her kick her chubby legs in excitement. Just really trying to feel these moments. They are so small, so ordinary...but truly the best moments of my life.
Not long ago, I wrote about motherhood being a thankless job. Today I've realized how beautifully raw motherhood is...it is so hard at times, but so overwhelmingly wonderful, too. Today while I was nursing Piper before bed I just kept thinking that this is such a gift. Motherhood. My life. Being able to breastfeed. Staying home with my daughters. I've really been taking it for granted. Or rather, not taking the time to be in the moment. So often I rush through my day...skimming through a story real quick with Ellie, trying to rush Piper through a feeding so I can start dinner, whatever. Looking at Piper tonight, she was so content, sleeping peacefully through her whole feeding. She was so beautiful, with her chubby cheeks and dark hair...I just never want to forget that moment. I never want to forget what that looks like...her complete relaxation and peace with me.
My heart just aches with love for my children. I just don't want to forget what this is like. It's like I need to tattoo these images on my brain...Ellie reading a book in her car seat like she's a little adult. Piper smiling and cooing when I talk to her. These are such wonderful, small moments that are so ordinary, but really are the substance that give my life joy and meaning.
It is so wonderful that it hurts. I have felt kinda sad all day today, just thinking that my life won't be like this forever. I know there will be other wonderful things in the future, but I am so scared that I'll forget all these little things that are so meaningful. I wish I could videotape every moment, because sometimes I just fear that it will all slip away, and then my babies will be grown up and I won't remember what it was like to hold them, or the smell of their hair after a bath, or how tiny and perfect their little hands and feet were.
I don't ever want to look back and regret that I didn't cherish this time with my girls, or that I saw it as a burden instead of a gift. It doesn't change the fact that it's hard and overwhelming and crazy at times, but this time I have with Ellie and Piper is so priceless. It is a time for me to invest in them. To show them how much I love them, that they mean everything to me. To teach them and show them how to live.
Dear Ellie and Piper, my sweet and beautiful girls. You both are just the joy of my life. I can't believe God chose me to be your mom. I am so lucky. Both of you have changed me for the better. Ellie, your surprise arrival into our lives was one of the most difficult, humbling, and amazing things that has ever happened to me. I am so glad that we survived it, because my world is so much better with you in it. You are so intelligent and hilarious...you surprise and delight us every day with the things you say and do. Whenever I look at you, I think you look just like a little angel. Sounds silly, but it's true. You have the most beautiful golden curly hair, fair skin and blue eyes, and the most perfect dimples when you smile. You melt my heart with your kindness toward your sister, and how you try to comfort her when she cries. You are a wonderful big sister and I'm so proud of you. Piper, you have given me such an appreciation for my life as a mom. We have a special bond that makes me feel needed and loved by you. I love how you smile as soon as I look into your eyes, and you instantly calm down when I hold you. You are so beautiful with your dark hair and olive skin. I'm eternally grateful for the physical bond we have through nursing...it is a true gift to me that I'm able to feed you and experience that aspect of motherhood. I love you both more than I can ever describe. I hope someday you both will be able to read this and know, without a shadow of a doubt, how cherished and loved you are by your mom.
I am feeling so sentimental tonight. I have felt on the verge of tears all evening and I'm not really sure why. I've been thinking a lot about my life...my husband, my children, my relationship with God. Just trying to process where I am right now and how I'm living my life, if I'm really allowing myself to live freely, love deeply, and let myself truly feel everything.
I've been reflecting a lot on these small moments of my day...holding Ellie, reading stories, nursing Piper, watching her kick her chubby legs in excitement. Just really trying to feel these moments. They are so small, so ordinary...but truly the best moments of my life.
Not long ago, I wrote about motherhood being a thankless job. Today I've realized how beautifully raw motherhood is...it is so hard at times, but so overwhelmingly wonderful, too. Today while I was nursing Piper before bed I just kept thinking that this is such a gift. Motherhood. My life. Being able to breastfeed. Staying home with my daughters. I've really been taking it for granted. Or rather, not taking the time to be in the moment. So often I rush through my day...skimming through a story real quick with Ellie, trying to rush Piper through a feeding so I can start dinner, whatever. Looking at Piper tonight, she was so content, sleeping peacefully through her whole feeding. She was so beautiful, with her chubby cheeks and dark hair...I just never want to forget that moment. I never want to forget what that looks like...her complete relaxation and peace with me.
My heart just aches with love for my children. I just don't want to forget what this is like. It's like I need to tattoo these images on my brain...Ellie reading a book in her car seat like she's a little adult. Piper smiling and cooing when I talk to her. These are such wonderful, small moments that are so ordinary, but really are the substance that give my life joy and meaning.
It is so wonderful that it hurts. I have felt kinda sad all day today, just thinking that my life won't be like this forever. I know there will be other wonderful things in the future, but I am so scared that I'll forget all these little things that are so meaningful. I wish I could videotape every moment, because sometimes I just fear that it will all slip away, and then my babies will be grown up and I won't remember what it was like to hold them, or the smell of their hair after a bath, or how tiny and perfect their little hands and feet were.
I don't ever want to look back and regret that I didn't cherish this time with my girls, or that I saw it as a burden instead of a gift. It doesn't change the fact that it's hard and overwhelming and crazy at times, but this time I have with Ellie and Piper is so priceless. It is a time for me to invest in them. To show them how much I love them, that they mean everything to me. To teach them and show them how to live.
Dear Ellie and Piper, my sweet and beautiful girls. You both are just the joy of my life. I can't believe God chose me to be your mom. I am so lucky. Both of you have changed me for the better. Ellie, your surprise arrival into our lives was one of the most difficult, humbling, and amazing things that has ever happened to me. I am so glad that we survived it, because my world is so much better with you in it. You are so intelligent and hilarious...you surprise and delight us every day with the things you say and do. Whenever I look at you, I think you look just like a little angel. Sounds silly, but it's true. You have the most beautiful golden curly hair, fair skin and blue eyes, and the most perfect dimples when you smile. You melt my heart with your kindness toward your sister, and how you try to comfort her when she cries. You are a wonderful big sister and I'm so proud of you. Piper, you have given me such an appreciation for my life as a mom. We have a special bond that makes me feel needed and loved by you. I love how you smile as soon as I look into your eyes, and you instantly calm down when I hold you. You are so beautiful with your dark hair and olive skin. I'm eternally grateful for the physical bond we have through nursing...it is a true gift to me that I'm able to feed you and experience that aspect of motherhood. I love you both more than I can ever describe. I hope someday you both will be able to read this and know, without a shadow of a doubt, how cherished and loved you are by your mom.
Monday, July 2, 2012
Our Tree
After the crazy storm this weekend, we found out a tree came down in our backyard in Lynchburg. Praise God, it didn't hit someone's house and only caused superficial damage that can be fixed (the shed and fences). And another huge blessing is that our neighbors were amazingly kind and helpful, and seemed to just be grateful for Billy and I coming to take care of it.
Billy and I drove down to Lynchburg on Saturday evening. After we found out about it, we asked Billy's mom to come watch the girls, for which we are so thankful! I'm glad I've been freezing extra milk for Piper, and so glad she takes a bottle when we need her to...I was able to leave her without really worrying too much. We just kinda assessed the damage on Saturday night, talked to some of the neighbors, and made our game plan. Then we went to the movie theater to kill some time in the air conditioning (we saw Prometheus...it kinda freaked me out, as I'm not really into alien movies that much, but Billy wanted to see it!), since most of Lynchburg is still without power and we didn't really feel like sitting in a hot house all evening. I am forever grateful for our friends, the Moizes, for letting us sleep at their house while we were in town, as there were no hotel vacancies and it would've been so hard to drive early in the morning on Sunday, then work all day, and then make the 2-hour trip home that night.
So we got up really early Sunday morning and worked on the tree, and I'm amazed at how quickly we were able to get it done. My Poppaw lent us his chainsaw and it got the job done! I used a pair of clippers while we worked on the top of the tree. After I clipped as many branches as I could, I focused on dragging brush and logs into piles. I felt bad because once we cleared most of the top of the tree, the logs were so big and I couldn't move some of them by myself. I also had to wait while Billy cut a few pieces at a time before I could move anything, as I didn't want to get too close to him and have him cut me in half with the chainsaw, hehe =). Actually, I am so impressed with Billy and his chainsaw skills. Considering how large the tree was, and that we were using a smaller chainsaw, he did an amazing job. He was also very "safety-conscious" and took his time. I'm so glad I'm married to a man who is wise and patient with things like this, and doesn't just rush into doing something and get reckless.
It was definitely a job...we worked for about 6 hours straight in the 95-degree heat, but we got what we wanted to done. We'll have to go back again this weekend, probably, because we've still got to repair the fences and clear out the brush/logs, but we've got to find out from our insurance company what they want to do as far as looking at it and giving us an estimate on the damage.
Poor Lynchburg looks like it got hit way harder than what we got in Harrisonburg. It's like a disaster zone there, and our neighborhood still doesn't have power there and they're estimating it won't be until Friday or this weekend before it comes back. Our poor tenants have a 6-week-old baby...I can't imagine enduring this heat without power (especially with a little baby!).
It could've been so much worse, so I'm thankful that it was just a tree, shed, and a couple fences that got damaged and that we were able to take care of it ourselves. Still not sure how we're going to get the rest of the stump out of the ground...the tree uprooted but it's still partially in the ground, so we'll probably tackle that this weekend.
Here are some pictures of the tree:
And, of course, no post is complete without this little cutie:
Billy and I drove down to Lynchburg on Saturday evening. After we found out about it, we asked Billy's mom to come watch the girls, for which we are so thankful! I'm glad I've been freezing extra milk for Piper, and so glad she takes a bottle when we need her to...I was able to leave her without really worrying too much. We just kinda assessed the damage on Saturday night, talked to some of the neighbors, and made our game plan. Then we went to the movie theater to kill some time in the air conditioning (we saw Prometheus...it kinda freaked me out, as I'm not really into alien movies that much, but Billy wanted to see it!), since most of Lynchburg is still without power and we didn't really feel like sitting in a hot house all evening. I am forever grateful for our friends, the Moizes, for letting us sleep at their house while we were in town, as there were no hotel vacancies and it would've been so hard to drive early in the morning on Sunday, then work all day, and then make the 2-hour trip home that night.
So we got up really early Sunday morning and worked on the tree, and I'm amazed at how quickly we were able to get it done. My Poppaw lent us his chainsaw and it got the job done! I used a pair of clippers while we worked on the top of the tree. After I clipped as many branches as I could, I focused on dragging brush and logs into piles. I felt bad because once we cleared most of the top of the tree, the logs were so big and I couldn't move some of them by myself. I also had to wait while Billy cut a few pieces at a time before I could move anything, as I didn't want to get too close to him and have him cut me in half with the chainsaw, hehe =). Actually, I am so impressed with Billy and his chainsaw skills. Considering how large the tree was, and that we were using a smaller chainsaw, he did an amazing job. He was also very "safety-conscious" and took his time. I'm so glad I'm married to a man who is wise and patient with things like this, and doesn't just rush into doing something and get reckless.
It was definitely a job...we worked for about 6 hours straight in the 95-degree heat, but we got what we wanted to done. We'll have to go back again this weekend, probably, because we've still got to repair the fences and clear out the brush/logs, but we've got to find out from our insurance company what they want to do as far as looking at it and giving us an estimate on the damage.
Poor Lynchburg looks like it got hit way harder than what we got in Harrisonburg. It's like a disaster zone there, and our neighborhood still doesn't have power there and they're estimating it won't be until Friday or this weekend before it comes back. Our poor tenants have a 6-week-old baby...I can't imagine enduring this heat without power (especially with a little baby!).
It could've been so much worse, so I'm thankful that it was just a tree, shed, and a couple fences that got damaged and that we were able to take care of it ourselves. Still not sure how we're going to get the rest of the stump out of the ground...the tree uprooted but it's still partially in the ground, so we'll probably tackle that this weekend.
Here are some pictures of the tree:
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| Our poor shed...Billy was pretty bummed about that, since he and Tommy just built that last year |
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| Through one yard... |
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| And into another (this was after we had cut most of the top of the tree) |
And, of course, no post is complete without this little cutie:
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| Ellie and her cheesy fake smile =) |
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| Wearing Daddy's hat |
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| Trying out the safety goggles |
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